My friends told me this weekend that I have a lot of amusing bathroom stories (Consider that a warning.)
I think I’m just unlucky. And I drink a lot of water.
Last week I was in my favorite Starbucks and noticed signs on both sides of the ladies’ room door. “KNOCK first!” on the outside and detailed instructions telling you how to know if the door was really locked were posted on the inside.
Just to be safe I positioned a kid outside to guard.
Last winter at the enormous Jo-Ann fabric store a lady walked into my stall and then started a conversation, but I figure that was cosmic pay-back for what I did at Dunkin’ Donuts last year.
I was on a trip to Hershey, PA, (a chocolate wonderland) and went with a friend, her son, and my daughters to the Dunkin’ Donuts right by Hershey Park.
We walked into an almost-empty restaurant. One lady employee was washing the front windows and a younger lady employee was behind the counter.
My group went to the counter to order. I decided to go wash my hands.
At the ladies’ room, the handle didn’t turn all the way easily and seemed to be stiff, so I pulled extra hard.
Of course, the employee who’d been cleaning the windows was now on the toilet. The door wasn’t stuck, it had been locked. An awkward moment ensued. I backed out, gibbering and apologizing. Very embarrassing for both of us, but mostly her.
I returned to my friends, ordered and found a table in the far corner. My friend was going to the loo before we left and I told her what had happened and suggested she take her son to guard the door.
I watched her walk to the back, pull the door hard and then back away, gibbering and apologizing. The OTHER employee had been in the bathroom on the toilet and the door had not adequately locked.
We fled the premises. In the car we were doing that awkward joking thing. I lamented the fact that we would not be welcome at that Dunkin’ Donuts if they recognized us as the bathroom intruders.
We decided if we needed an emergency blueberry cake doughnut (the best kind) we would need some sort of disguise for future visits. Since I had a Sharpie marker in my purse, I suggested finger mustaches.
I don’t think they’ll suspect a thing. What do you think? Maybe a fake French accent too?
Are there any places where you could benefit from a disguise? I may use this if I have to go back to the French bakery where my skirt blew up. I’ll use my Italian accent there.
Photo attributions: massdistraction on flickr